Promises - Kept Too Late.

Bryan and his mother look at his new diploma.

Tonight, I am feeling sad and like a bit of a jerk. I made a promise to a family, and while I had always intended on keeping it, I procrastinated too long and now it is too late for one of those family members. Just two days ago I thought to myself, as the last two days of my staycation wound down, I have got to do those reprints for the Showalter family. I met Bryan Showalter and his family while shooting the Glen Burnie High School graduation last June and promised the family I would email them some pictures of Bryan.

Bryan was graduating that day, like hundreds of other kids, but what made him different was Bryan was fighting bone cancer and almost couldn't make it to his own graduation. If it were not for the help of the Glen Burnie Volunteer Fire Department bringing Bryan on a gurney in their ambulance, he would not have been able to attend. It was a very great thing for the department to do. I am not going to retell the story of me photographing Bryan and his family; that is not what this post is about. If you want, you can read it here in this post "Be kind, for everyone wemeet is fighting a hard battle."

This post is about keeping promises and the consequences of breaking them. Meeting Bryan changed me a little - just like every meaningful assignment I shoot, changes me a little, hopefully for the better. It made me think that I am lucky to be healthy, have a great wife, and a good job doing something that makes me happy, most of the time. I also thought about my mom, who is fighting her own cancers and has had her ups and downs the last few years. God has given us a gift of my mom's cancer being in remission. I really have nothing to complain about.

My vacation ended today. I went back to work. I didn't make the reprints. While I was sitting in the photo office, the editor of the Maryland Gazette, The Capital's sister paper, came in and told me he couldn't find the images of Bryan Showalter in the archive. As soon as he said Bryan's name, I knew. I said, "Did he pass away?" The editor said yes. My heart sank. I thought about how many times I said to myself, "I have got to get them their reprints," and then I would do something else. I should have kept my promise.

I prepped the reprints tonight, and instead of sending them in an email as I said I would, I am going out and getting 8x10's made tomorrow, seven total, and I will get them to the family somehow. I am thinking of going to the service and giving them to the Showalters, but I am not sure if that is proper. I am not sure if they need time to grieve before being presented with images of their son. I am not sure if this small, albeit late, gesture will do anything to ease their pain or my own guilt. I do know that from now on, I am going to try and keep even the smallest of promises.

Rest in peace, Bryan.