"Be kind, for everyone we meet is fighting a hard battle."


Bryan and his mother, Dawn, check out his
new diploma.

I am trying to slowly adapt a new attitude as I grow older. A kinder, gentler, more understanding Paul. I hate to do it, but to quote Maria Shriver, quoting Plato, "Be kind, for everyone we meet is fighting a hard battle." We all have problems in this world, but as a photojournalist, I have seen, and photographed, people who have had problems that make mine look insignificant and I really should not be complaining.

I was reminded of this tonight when I was shooting the Glen Burnie High School graduation. It was held in Upper Marlboro at The Show Place Arena, 36 miles away from the school. I was making my rounds, shooting the happy graduates, getting ready to march in the procession. They were primping, hi-fiving, texting and having a good time. This was not my reminder.

As I was waiting for the celebration to start I noticed some EMT's with a gurney, and it had a student on it, behind the curtain that separated the backstage area. I wondered if someone got injured before the ceremony, but they didn't seem to be giving the student any medical attention.


Always sweat talk the ladies, you never know when they can
help with info, and it is just nice.

In another backstage area I asked a couple of ladies who were Glen Burnie High School custodians, whom I had been chatting up earlier in the evening, what was the story with the kid on the gurney? They began to tell me that he was real sick and he almost couldn't make it to the event because his parents had no way to get him there, due to his medical condition and need to travel by wheelchair or gurney. They told me that volunteers from the Glen Burnie Volunteer Fire Company brought him there in their ambulance. I thought that it was great of them to do for the family, and I wanted to find out more and possibly photograph them as part of my graduation coverage.

I went about my shooting and kept them in the back of my mind. At one point I saw the boy, now in his wheelchair, peeking out from behind the curtain. I raised my camera and shot a few frames, and I think he caught me taking his picture. These were not that good due to me being far away at the time and not having a longer lens. I also feel a little guilty shooting people who are having a tough time, be it medical, victims of tragedy or other incidents. It is part of my job and something that I have gotten better at in my 15-plus-year career.

So the sneak attack was not going to work, and I don't like shooting that way either, so I figured I would take the direct approach. I went up to his parents, introduced myself and asked if I could photograph them, to which they agreed. I was still feeling guilty, but I also felt that I was doing them and our readers a service, telling part their son's big moment of graduating.

Bryan and his family wait backstage.
After making some images, I stopped and started talking to the parents, asking their son's name and age. They told me their son's name is Bryan Showalter Jr., that he was 17 years old. This is where it can start to get tough; I needed to know what was wrong with Bryan. Getting info like this from a subject can sometimes be a slow process of building trust. His mother, Dawn, started to tell me he had bone cancer, but she began to tear up after saying bone. I said that she didn't need continue, but she finished and told me he was diagnosed in 2008. I tried to comfort her by telling her of my mom's own fight with cancer and how she had it in remission, but I could tell that it was not helping.

At this point, Bryan made his way out into the field of graduates, sitting off to the side in his wheelchair. His family were still sitting behind the stage and could see him from the parted curtain. His sister was trying to photograph him with a small point and shoot camera and not having much luck. I stood next to her and made some shots with my camera and showed her and the rest of the family. I then said I would send them anything good I shot and got their email. This brought a smile to their faces and was the least I could do for them for letting me share their moment.

As I was shooting this family I couldn't help but fear some of the other photographers there would catch on to what I was shooting and start crowding in and also shooting the family. This fear was not based in my selfishness, but in what a pack of photographers could do in a situation like this, to a family just trying to deal with their son's illness and his big day. Luckily no one caught on.

When they started calling graduates names I went out front and waited for Bryan's to be called. I shot him rolling up the ramp to the stage, getting his diploma, showing it to his mom and then them heading back towards the ambulance. I gave them my card and told them that if there was anything I could ever do for them to just call. Then I left. I was happy that I could capture their son's big day.

As I meet and photograph these kinds of people, throughout the years, I am reminded of how lucky I am and that I should enjoy every day the best I can. Don't sweat the small stuff because most of the battles I am fighting are not that hard compared to some of the fights other people face daily.

Bryan gets his diploma.
Be sure to check out my slideshow here, and The Capital newspaper's Anne Arundel County high school graduation coverage on http://www.hometownannapolis.com/ and http://www.hometownglenburnie.com/

Comments

Anonymous said…
What an inspiring story. That you for the reminder that most stuff is small stuff. I have recently completed my fourth surgery from Breast cancer and I am a 2 year survivor, everything else in my life is really is small stuff.
God bless and I hope all goes well with your recovery and you cancer stays away. Cancer sucks.
Bob Gilbert said…
Fantastic job, Paul, proud of you. Great piece of photojournalism,as usual.
Thanks Bob, I learned it all from you;) And we will have lunch soon, once all the grads are done.
Unknown said…
Seriously, this story has blessed my heart in so many ways,....No words!!! You are a blessing to so many!

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